Like a good marriage, loving one another sometimes isn’t all there is to it. There has to be more to it than the passion, the need, the desire, and the unrealistic expectations of a life of luxury. So here it is—I’m opening the veins so the non-writing world can see the real reasons we writers do what we do.
- We loathe housework. We can’t be expected to dust, sweep, mop, clean toilets and write the great American novel.
- It gives us an excuse to drink coffee or a mocha in the middle of the day.
- So we can put off going to the grocery store until the only thing left to eat in the house is a near-empty bag of stale pretzels.
- Exercise? Seriously? I have to finish this chapter before my self imposed deadline, which I’ll push back again and again.
- It gives us an excuse to politely bow out of any social invitation. Birthday party? Sorry, I’m under a deadline. Cook out? I have to finish this chapter. Err…wait a minute—free meal? Do I have to bring anything? If not, make the effort. Those pretzels are really stale.
- It gives us a reason to google images of ‘hot shirtless men’ for character images of course.
- It gives us an excuse to stay up way past a normal bedtime because we are in the zone.
- It gives us an excuse after staying up way past a normal bedtime to take a nap the next day.
- It lets us legally kill people we don’t like, fall in love with people we’d like to spend a lifetime with, and heal some of the wounds we’ve carried far too long.
- For a brief moment in time, we are in control of an entire universe.
So how about it…why do you write?